To the man who ______, thank you.

We can remain in a state of love when we recognize that everyone is doing the best they can to get their needs met. –Eckhart Tolle

Living in love sounds easy, and I have to tell you, from my experience, it ain’t always so!

If there’s someone bugging you - that’s your ego. That’s you thinking a situation should be the way you want it to be.

If you have a desire to live your life with inner peace, joy, freedom and love, please know that this road to ‘enlightenment’ never ends. You don’t really ever ‘get there.’ And no one is handing out a certificate of achievement.

Ok, I’m really into feelings lately! And of course, not all feelings are good. But if you have them, you’re alive and that’s a really good thing.

Most people are aware of the typical 6 feelings:

As per last Saturday’s inSight this is the continuation. OK, so you have experienced the ‘state’ of the fairytale. You really know your person and you still love having sex with them.

This doesn’t mean they will be your ‘happily ever after.’ You know why? Because if you knew you’d have them forever, I fear you might get lazy.

Since we are dealing with all kinds of people in this world, we may not always easily see things the same way. Right? One accident and many different stories of how it happened.

We also didn’t learn effective communication, so unless you’ve done some of your own training, many simply lack the skills, which can cause a conflict to escalate very quickly when what you want is a resolution.

I think by now you know how passionate I am about you being in charge of YOU. The fact is, other people affect us, and you affect others. You walk into a room of 100 people and get 100 different perceptions of who they think you are (without much information). 

Since we are all wired for connection and belonging we naturally want people to like us. We also know, not everyone will. Just like you will connect with some, but not others. 

Here’s a twist on some of what I normally say.

“Instead of not caring what other people think about you, ask yourself - what will someone think of when they think of you.”

I heard Marianne Williamson define success as, “you go to bed at night knowing that somebody else’s life is better because you were in it that day.”

This means we all have the power to be successful.

I rise up to allow myself to be all that I was meant for and to follow the inner voice directing my callings. Then I can put my arms around those who want the same thing. So we can feel connected - to ourselves and to each other. That’s a world in which heaven is here on earth. 

The world of ‘I’ and competition is an old paradigm. We need to evolve to a world that is moving forward no matter what. The question is, will it destroy us or will we grow with and for it?

I just finished reading the book ‘Attached’ by Amir Levine and Rachel Heller. I was hesitant to read it because I dislike putting people in boxes. I believe we all have a little of everything in us.

I believe the purpose of a relationship is to provide a loving safe place where you are heard and understood. But this takes skill. In order for someone to hear you - you need the time to explain, and to be understood - they need to know your truth.

Whether you’re in an intimate relationship or not, this applies to all humans. We either get better where we’re at or we’re getting ready to be ready! Years ago while I was studying, I thought a good title of a book could be, “It begins with me, then you, and then the relationship.” Funny this title has never left me. We come together with our own individual beliefs and values. Our past and upbringing is what creates these combined with previous life experiences and hence we have a story. We are all unique and imperfect and yet we come together and believe things will just work out. We will find ‘the one’ who will see us and love us and we’ll be ok and accepted, once and for all. Haha. Isn’t that humorous?

I hope you’ve never felt like I think you need to change. My purpose here is to provide you with some ideas that help me stay centered and aligned. I do my best to be my own best friend, learn, apply and it works. I am absolutely living my best life and I want that for you as well.

So often we hear people say, “I just want to be loved for me.” Well I think you are actually.

I’m beginning to ask this question instead, ‘how am I giving love?’ I believe there’s actually more feelings generated in my body when I give love, than when I receive love. 

Think about this for a moment. How does your body feel when someone shows you love vs when you show love? Like gifts. They say it’s better to give a gift than to receive one. 🤔

A friend of mine just ended a relationship with someone who is not stable. When we discussed how she got here, and what her lesson was, she became very clear that her guidance system was on full alert but she pushed it away many times.

Here are some ways your guidance may be telling you to pay attention:

First of all, you were taught to judge. To compare, to compete, to look/act a certain way and to be aware of how others are doing. This is your societal teaching, so you can take yourself off the hook. Wasn’t your fault.

But - living at your full potential means knowing we weren’t taught all of the skills necessary to live with peace, love, joy, comfort, acceptance and way less stress! So it’s up to you to change this bad habit - if you want to.

I write to you today because I have been surrounded by grace over the past week as I’ve been alone to mourn the loss of my amazing Dad. I’ve been following my guidance, for what my heart needs and I’m so grateful that I have. What I mean by grace, is a feeling of comfort, security and calm. An influence of spirit unexplained and not outside of myself.

If all your days are numbered, have you ever wondered yours?Have you been there and done that, or are there still more doors?You can’t explain your journey - where you’ve been or where you’re headed,Who has been important and of those, has all been mended?

My Dad is in the hospital and I just want to say - please take the time to love the ones you’re with. You just don’t know how long you have or how long you have with the people in your life. I’m so thankful for the healing I’ve done. My forgiveness and hurts from the past have long been replaced with endless joy, laughter and memories that will last a lifetime. The tools I’ve gathered along the way have allowed me to accept and handle anything that shows up in my life.