Starting a new romance?

Hey there!

The beginning of a new romance can be tricky. I’ve had many opportunities in my 47 years, so I’m well versed in this topic!

Here’s the thing - some opportunities work out and some don’t. There will always be another opportunity, so don’t get discouraged.

There are so many unanswered questions in the beginning.

Who is this person really?
Will it last?
Is it worth my time/money?
Will they be who they say they are, or are they just trying to impress me?
Are they trustworthy and have integrity?
Do they want to really know me, or do they just want a warm body to curl up to? (Ha, dude’s are NOT thinking this)!
What are we?
Where is this going?
Will they fit in with my friends/family?

Because we are all unique, each pairing will be different than anything you’ve had prior to it.

Here’s my take on what’s required at this exciting time in your life:

1. Intuition

2. Courage

3. Curiosity

4. Patience

The challenge is to take the new experience without holding onto how it’s been in the past. Fears may come up because of disappointments in the past. We must keep our heart open and give this person the benefit of the doubt.

We take our lessons from the past and realize we have more to learn (mostly about yourself). You’ve got a new teacher now, who will expose what you need to learn (it may not feel like you’re ready to learn, but they are in your life for a reason).

The INTUITION part is what goes on inside of you. You get an inner nudge or instruction, a feeling. Pay attention to that. Then you need the COURAGE to follow the intuitive hit. Give/get the phone number, walk over to them, wink, smile, whatever. This is tricky because of our fear of rejection. Get over it. Listen to your intuition. You are safe and will know in the end. Take the chance! I sometimes wonder if that’s why there are so many lonely people today. Fear keeps us alone.

CURIOSITY - ask lots of questions. Not to test them, but to learn. What’s important to them? What do they value? And then witness them without judgement. Let them show up. Observe how they treat and talk about others. If commitment is important to you, ask how they feel about it. If casual is all you want, be open and honest. It’s so much easier this way. People know what they want. Sometimes we’re scared to ask because we may not like the answer. More courage. Pay attention to how you feel while with them.

PATIENCE - getting to know someone takes time. I know, if you’re hungry you just want to eat, but not yet. Enjoy the ‘not knowing’ and stay grounded in your life. The life you had before they caught your eye. See it as an adventure. You don’t know anything yet. Don’t ever think someone is ‘the one.’ Keep your eyes open and learn about them to see if they are a good fit for you.

I'll say it again, meeting someone new is not meeting the one. All you have to do is date. And if you want to see each other for another date, then go. Keep doing just that. There are no rules. Be yourself. They’ll find out anyway. Use your head, not just your heart or sex organs. After a while, as you get to know each other and still want to hang out, a commitment and plans for the future happen naturally. And if it doesn’t, then be grateful for the experience, take the lessons, heal the hurt and read this again the next time around! So simple. Why does it seem so complicated out there today?

All the best to you in love!

If you're looking for some guidance on finding love, healing from love, or making your current love better, I'm here for you. Love isn't to make your life great, it's to make it greater.

From your friend, who loves love!
Kristi 💛