Hello hello!
Because of your accumulated experiences, it’s obvious that your past will affect who you come to be. My question is, how does it affect you? Positively or negatively?
If you’ve done your reflecting, healed from it and can see the good it brought to you, that’s some good work right there. High five to you and please help others if they want it!
“I can’t make your pain go away but I can help you carry it with elegance.” What a beautiful sentence by Caroline Myss. I choose to elegantly carry my pain and I enjoy helping others do the same.
Make something good come out of your pain.
Holding onto pain can show up through: isolating, being easily agitated, fear, anger, too much independence, trust issues, negative talk (of self or other), resignation, numbing etc.
If (when) you’ve been hurt, betrayed, let down, broken up with, ghosted or needs that have not been met, there can be a lot of unprocessed emotions lingering beneath your exterior. I can almost say for certain, we all have residue of grief. This is just part of the human condition. Plus, if you’re hurt, your mind can add more pain by bringing up all the other times you’ve been hurt. So it can compound. It’s not fun for a while.
We want to make sure though, that old hurts don’t define you. To say that a bad experience changes you would be pretty accurate. I just want us all to learn from it, not let it take you down.
Being hurt can humble you. It can show you where you were weak (next time be stronger). It can show you where you were unloving (next time be kinder). It can teach you a lesson (if you’re willing to look at your part).
It can also close your heart. Rarely when we’ve experienced something bad, do we stay open.
I’m suggesting that you acknowledge your pain.
What didn’t work, what was your part, what are you willing to do differently next time? Take the lesson, honor yourself and the other, care about your well being, get support, atone, forgive and stay open to the new possibilities that lie ahead.
With healing, comes freedom from the pain.
If you need help with any of this, I’m here for you. I’ve had to get really good at it.
All my love,
K 💛
